The last 3 months have been the most stressful and depressing in our life. We have also learned more in that time than we would have ever expected. We are being stretched and broken.

We have doubted allot of our recent decisions and actions. Understandably, We lost our income in November 09. Bills, loans, cars every thing is past due, first time in our life. I have gone to interview after interview with no positive results. I got to the point that I was willing to take anything.

So yes…Dead end…we have felt like we are at the end of the road and there was no where to turn…Did we make a wrong turn? Did we miss our turn off? No…We seen what WE wanted…we knew what WE wanted to do…WE knew where WE where going…what WE didn’t see was the “detour” sign.

God told us to come here… Yes
Once we got that we didn’t ask anything ells. We assumed that God was going to use us to “change life’s” we thought that our talent, skill, life stories and experience was why God called us. Now we are here at the lowest point that we have ever been. Yes we have had ALLOT that has happened in our 23 years of life and yes I do believe that God will line up people for us to minister to here but the MAIN reason…Reason number 1 was to bring life change to our life!

So what needed to change? Pride.
Yeah pride. When we got here I had interviews and job offers about 10. I turned them all down because I felt some where shady and honestly I thought that I was “better” than the other. I never noticed the pride until we moved. It’s hard not to get prideful when you are 21 with a wife that can stay at home and raise your kids, new cars, nice house…everything we needed…and now we have nothing.

The last 2 years we have devoted our self’s to ministry and even though we played a part in life change our spiritual life, marriage and family all suffered. Our pride got the best of us. We sit here now and look at how we always wanted “more” we wanted better cars, bigger house, better job, more pay and new everything. When I had my last “real” job, I was always stressed because God forbid, I might make under $35.00 an hour, $25.00 an hour or even get the point that I hit the lowest possible of $16.00 an hour. To me, the world would have been over.

Right now I am praying that God will provide me with a job, any job. Out here the minimum wage is 7.25 and I’m okay with that. I’m looking for 2 jobs and I think about the fact that I’m going to be working 80+ Hours a week and what ill be able to bring in, it’s sad but I’m okay with that.

There is so much we have learned that it’s hard to put it into words. We feel so blessed to have learned so much. When we decided to move I said that we have become complacent in our life, we where very comfortable with everything. To be comfortable= not growing. We are not comfortable at all! So in know there is still more to be learned. Weather we like it or not.

So ill leave you with this…

“It takes no faith to trust God when He is obviously moving. Real faith is holding on & believing when God SEEMS absent” –Rick Warren

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